so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize