a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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