To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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