found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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