No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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