He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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