My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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