dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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