I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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