So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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