Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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