All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
