it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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