Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
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