Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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