State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
