I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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