I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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