I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
