PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize