last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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