Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
