I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
