I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
