What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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