Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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