well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
