Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
