to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
