PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
