Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
