He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
