are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
