I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
