i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
