I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
How external is "for external use only"?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Randomize
