worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
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