i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
