first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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