Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
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