You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
