Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Dicks are not precious.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
