I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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