she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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