So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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