Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
In America we eat man semen.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
