I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
