About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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