Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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