I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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